Trying To Reach My Happy Place

It doesn’t seem to be working too well at the moment.

All I want is to go to my happy place. A little place in my mind where everything is calm and quiet. A place where I can find clarity in the mess that I call my brain.

I try to drown out the TV. The screaming one year old. The all around chatter that is from the people in my household.

I put on my headphones and search for a song. Any song. Just one song that I can listen to that will drown out all of that mess.

First song. Not helping. I turn the volume up. Nope, didn’t help. I can still hear it all.

I need to get to my happy place. I need to reach it.

Next song, was a waste since it was mostly noise anyway.

I still hear the mess. I still feel like I am going insane. I turn the volume up four notches. Please get me to my happy place.

I found a song. Still isn’t loud enough though. I turn it up another five notches. The music is pounding on my eardrums. I close my eyes and press the headphones harder against my ears. I will reach my happy place.

I am venturing into this world of mine where I am free. I have no responsibilities. I have no worries. All I hear is my song. The song that is aiding me on my quest to find my happy place. It doesn’t matter if the volume is too loud. I like it loud.

Each note that hits my ears is a pleasure. I can breathe. I am reaching that grassy field in the sun and I am reaching clarity. I need to reach my happy place.

I can feel the sun. I just need to go a little further. I don’t care how much the volume hurts I just want everything to go away. I just want to be in my happy place.

No more tears. No more yells. No more fits. No more anything. JUST PEACE!

I sit and endure the pain until I reach my happy place.